


Phone call

by Maki_Aries



Category: SKAM (Italy)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Siblings, shitty parenting, this is sad like i don't know
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-22
Updated: 2019-04-22
Packaged: 2020-01-24 05:17:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18564700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maki_Aries/pseuds/Maki_Aries
Summary: Eleonora is left alone. Again. But her brother is just a phone call away





	Phone call

Eleonora stared at her phone, thumb hovering over the little phone symbol on Edoardo's contact. She could do this. She just had to call him and … talk she guessed, apologize. Eleonora tapped the icon, closed her eyes and held the phone to her ear. The first and second ringtones passed before she suddenly hanged up and threw her phone at the other end of the couch.

 

This was a stupid idea anyway.

 

The living room was quiet. Maybe too quiet if the only things she could hear was the traffic outside and her breathing. Eleonora should get up and turn on the radio or something. She should get up and start cleaning the apartment or start cooking dinner. It was almost time. Dinner for one, she thought. A short sharp burst of laugh escaped her and all she could do was trying to breathe through the pain. In. Out. In. Out. She couldn't cry. She mustn't cry. Crying never fixed anything.

 

Her phone buzzed on her right and her head snapped to it. She stared at it with wide eyes. It buzzed again, and again so Eleonora stretched to reach her phone but didn't bother to sit up again. She just stayed there, laying on her couch, trying to keep it together.

 

The screen displayed some new messages in hers and Filippo's conversation “Sava(ge) it's in our DNA”

 

**Filippo**

what happened to the 'radio silence is forbidden for more than three days' rule?

you still pissed at me for the groceries?

because i promise you won't have to do any chores for a whole week when I came back. :: angel emoji:: ::heart emoji::

 

Eleonora huffed before typing a reply.

 

**Eleonora**

two weeks

**Filippo**

SHE LIVES !!!

annnnd hell no

did you take me for an amateur or something?

two weeks pfff

it's one week or nothing young lady

 

Something minutely eased up in her chest at the familiar stream of texts coming from Filippo. She answered a simple 'it's a deal'. Eleonora could just put down her phone now. Filippo had been reassured. She didn't have to bother him. He was on a holiday, having fun with his friends. But the urge to tell him everything was getting stronger at each second of silence around her. She inhaled, began to type 'mom just le', she stopped, hesitated, thumbs hovering the keys before she quickly deleted the text and put down the phone, curling further against the cushions.

 

Eleonora was perfectly fine on her own. She was. Some breathing exercise, a good meal, and a movie and everything would be-

 

Her phone buzzed on the cushion and she picked it up again.

 

**Filippo**

i saw the bubbles Ele, talk to me

 

It would be so easy to type some evasive comments about miracles happening. Filippo wasn't very fond of chores after all. But it was her brother on the other end. He knew her. He loved her.

 

**Eleonora**

mom just left

her boyfriend doesn't have his children for the rest of the holidays

 

 

A few seconds later, her screen lighted up with an incoming call.

 

“ _ She's a cold bitch and she doesn't deserve an inch of you _ ” was the first thing her brother told her as she picked up.

 

“Ciao Filo” she replied. Why did her voice have to sound so weird?

 

“ _ I'm dead serious, Amo. Not. A. Fucking. Inch” _

 

She hummed lightly, bringing a cushion from behind her to hug against her chest. “How is it going with-”

 

Filo interrupted her “ _ Do not even try. _ ” His voice was firm but filled with that warmth and love. Suddenly she was a crying 13-years-old having to be coaxed by that same voice only a touch younger into eating her plate of pasta. There was a hand holding hers and another one rubbing soothing circles on her back. “ _ How are you feeling right now?” _

 

Eleonora passed her tongue on her lips, trying to come up with some kind of precise words to describe it. At each breath, she felt that despair climbed up and up until it was in her throat. “I should stop hoping right ?”

 

“ _ Amo- _ ”

 

“Like, each time I – I hope so much Filo and nothing happen, it's like – I'm feeling like shit Fi', I just want her, to – to just look at me and to – that she would just – just – I should really do like you and stop – stop hoping”

 

For an instant, the line was silent before Filo spoke in a low voice “ _ I do hope, Ele. But – yeah I guess I'm a little bit more used to it than you. So I avoid both of them. _ ”

 

She felt the tears coming and opened her eyes wide open to avoid it. Keep it together Eleonora. Just keep it together. Her brother sounded defeated, yet there was that nonchalant uncaring edge to his voice, the one telling Eleonora that her brother wasn't whining right now. She swallowed the self-deprecation, throat tight.

 

Her brother continued “ _ It's normal to hope Ele, they're our parents, it's like biological or some shit like that. And it sucks because we end up doubting ourselves instead of them. Like we should because – Amo: you didn't anything wrong, neither did I. they're just … cold-hearted underserving assholes. Mom just as much as Dad eh? And no” _ he added “ _ paying for the apartment is not some kind of grand gesture of their part okay ?” _

 

She stayed silent, her grip tightening on the phone as she tried so hard to just  _ not cry _ .

 

Eleonora heard her brother sighed on the other end of the line “ _ Just let it go, Amo. I know you as I had made you. It's just ... you and me here.”  _ She bit her lips, why did he need to do that ?! She was fine! But Filippo wouldn't stop talking “ _ You can cry as much as you want, it's okay. Because I won't hang up until you're good okay? It's just you and me, Ele. I got you” _

 

Eleonora closed her eyes shut, and exhaled a shaky breath. Then she let it go.

 

The first tear rolled down, quickly followed by a second and a third until she didn't bother counting the rest. Her entire body curled further and further against the fabric of the couch, her knees nearly touching her chin, pathetic sounds escaping her mouth. “ _It's okay Amo,_ ” Filippo said “ _just let it all out, I'm here_ ”

 

 

\----

 

Eleonora didn't know how long she cried on her couch, hands gripping her phone so tight it hurt now, but she felt tired. So tired. Bone-tired. 

 

_“You feeling better? I read crying lead to a chemical reaction, and that you feel better afterward_ ”

 

She snorted, before getting up to find a tissue. Crying was always so gross. “You read that on Pinterest didn't you ?”

 

“ _ Yep” _

 

Eleonora put down the phone to blow her nose, Filippo didn't need to hear that on top of everything else. When she picked it up again, she noticed the hour. Fuck. “Shit Filippo, I just completely fucked up your evening didn't I ?”

 

Her brother only dead-panned “ _ Oh I don't think I will ever be able to forgive you that Eleonora _ ”

 

She chuckled, fingers worrying the loose threads of her sweat. She would have to fix those sleeves. “Thank you for being there”

 

“ _ Anytime.”  _ A beat of silence passed, and Eleonora tried to push down the feeling of awkwardness. It was her brother, not some kind of stranger. He had been her shoulder to cry on since she was a little girl. It was Filippo who bandaged her grazed knees and it was in his bed she found refuge when a nightmare or a fight between her parents came up. It was Filippo's number she called at the hospital, terrified and alone before her operation. Her brother said, “ _ Listen, if you need me here, I can come back earlier, Ele -” _

 

Oh hell no, he wasn't going to give up on his friend for her. She hurriedly cut him “No no no, Filo, no it's okay, I'm gonna managed, it was just … just too much. With mama and -” She closed her mouth, unsure how to carried on with the discussion. She knew she needed to talk to him about the fight of the party … and of Edoardo too. She knew it as soon as Filippo passed the door a few days ago.

 

“ _ Ele ?” _

 

Eleonora walked to the kitchen as she gathered some courage to talk. She needed to eat, and something to occupy her nervous hands for what was about to come “There is something I need to tell you”

 


End file.
